I am not the average female. I never wanted to settle down, get married, have kids, live in a house in the suburbs, and live happily ever after. Instead of being in fear of gaining weight or having a man cheat on me, I have fears such as:
- Fear of intimacy
- Fear of failure
- Fear that I will regret something
- Fear of being mediocre
- Fear of dying without traveling to all the places on my Bucket List
So I’m bewildered as to why I fear going to Italy. Yes, I’m excited, of course. But something has been bothering and nagging me about this trip that I will embark on in just 6 days. I think I’m scared that Italy might be another Paris. Let me explain…
My very first trip abroad just a few years after college was to Paris. Back then, Paris was my ultimate travel dream. My passion to see the Eiffel Tower, visit the Louvre to see the Mona Lisa, and visit the Palace of Versailles was the pinnacle of my travel dreams. But when I got there, nothing was like I imagined. I was disappointed by almost everything that I experienced. I questioned if it was the man I was traveling with at the time, but I realized this wasn’t the case as we cut our Paris trip short and then went straight to Madrid, Spain, where we both ended up loving everything about the city. I’m a people person so maybe the rude Parisians had an effect on me back then. Everyone seemed cold and distant while the Spaniards seemed friendly and accommodating. I don’t know what exactly happened during my trip to Paris. I only know that I was so distraught at the severity of my disappointment, especially after spending thousands of dollars, which is a huge sum just a few years after graduating from college.
So perhaps I’m in fear of Italy being another Paris. Will the tourists at the Sistine Chapel be as annoying as the tourists in the Louvre? Will the waiters in Rome and Florence mock me because I can’t speak Italian? Will my imagination of exquisite beauty of art and architecture of the Italian masters underwhelm me? I guess my questions and curiosities will be answered when I get there. I do hope I get to experience what Goethe expressed:
“Until you have seen the Sistine Chapel, you can have no adequate conception of what man is capable of accomplishing.”
Of course, I wish to be in awe of the grandeur of Rome and it’s environs. I hope the spectacular displays of art make my jaw drop as it did in Istanbul. I hope the gelato and the wines of Italy are the most intoxicating. I hope the pasta is perfectly cooked al dente. I hope I find wonderful treasures of souvenirs to bring back home.
These questions and curiosities are the precise reasons why I travel–to explore, discover, and witness the splendors of all the exquisite beauty of this earth. Since “All roads lead to Rome,” and since my WanderLust always prevails, the inevitability of my being there starts in 6 days. I’m counting down. My heart beats for Rome!